The Zen of Acting
By Sheila Hageman, N2Arts Correspondent
How to get into the acting zone
 

y first acting role was as Christine in “I Remember Mama.”

It was performed at a small storefront children’s theatre in Connecticut, The Fantocini Theatre. My director, Albert, who always wore tight white jeans and a polo shirt, made all the children in the show cry. He blocked every single line from the first rehearsal and if we were off our mark by a foot, he screamed:

“What is your emotional motivation for being there?”

Tears poured down my face as I said, “You told me to.”

“But you need to create the ‘why’ Christine walks stage left when she says that.”

I was scared of every rehearsal. But in hindsight, I see how much I learned about acting. I was forced to know why my character did everything she did. I learned how to create the inner world for my character’s external actions.

I was so well prepared when the run began that I didn’t have to even think about my performance.  I didn’t have to be conscious of where I should be, or what my next line was because each line, move, and motivation fed off of the last. I was freed of my personal worries to just flow along as Christine because of all of my (and Albert’s) hard work. I had the structure and motivation of the play learned, so I was able to release the need to think of what I was doing as an actress. I’m grateful that one of my first acting experiences was so taxing, but yet so…Zen. 

Zen is the feeling of just letting everything be, so for me “Zen acting” means the sense of losing oneself and becoming one with the flow of the character—the feeling of rightness without striving for a specific goal. 

For example, as a professional actress I toured with a Theatre for Young Audiences show, which had a scene where my character needed to sob—it was challenging to come to the point where I wasn’t preparing myself for the tears. This is why I landed the part in the first place—I was the only actress at the callbacks who could break down on cue. I could not be thinking about the need to let myself go leading up to that scene, rather I had to trust that as my character I understood the why of my character’s breakdown and let the tears come naturally to her. 

I also discovered that the similarity between acting and Zen lies in not being attached to the outcome (bad or good). You just have to let it be. Once on the road, I was faced with the challenge of crying every day, sometimes performing three shows daily. I was very attached to the outcome, because if the emotion wasn’t there, my monologue didn’t ring true. Young audiences are often the most critical of performances.

I was breaking the basic Zen-like rules I had learned from Albert—give no thought to the outcome and trust that my body has learned the correct emotional response at the right moment. At some shows, I blocked myself by being too concerned with the outcome. I needed to be “on,” but that actually turned me “off.” That’s why my goal was more of a letting go as opposed to a doing.

I often think of Albert when I find myself stiffening up and forcing emotions. I breathe and remember the most simple of Zen teaching…begin again. I clear my mind and let go of any desired outcome. 

I Zen out and I simply begin again.

Sheila Hageman is a certified and registered yoga teacher. She graduated as valedictorian from Hunter College in January 2002 with a BA in English with a concentration in creative writing. A freelance writer, she is published in magazines such as Salon.com, Moxie, Fate, Science of Mind and New York City Voices. Sheila also has a background in theatre having performed both locally and nationally.